AGE and The Crazy Things We Do

Okay my friends and lovers here in the USA and abroad it is time for me to lighten up. It is Sunday again and I know this day of the week has nothing to do with anything other than it is the last day of weekend. While the world around us falls apart we shop and go to work and turn on our light switches and air conditioners and televisions and we surf the net to find the perfect gift for our loved ones or to upgrade our computers with memory or hubs or maybe even a DVD burner. I still don't have one of those yet but am in the market for one.

The last three days have been days of crazy sleep and I can't tell you why. I go to bed at 4, 5 or last night 8 p.m. and sleep hard and strong till 5 in the morning. I haven't got a clue why I can't stay awake or even watch a television program because of my closing eyes. I have given up on trying to watch TV on my 43 inch HDTV and have even thought of giving the thing to my father. He has a 24 inch TV and sits right on it. I guess I am so blessed to be able to see so good at an age of 49. I am going to enjoy my age while I have it because next month I will turn 50 and begin a life as a member of AARP. All the youth in the world will be able to call me an old geezer if they like but it will probably be an OLD GIMP GEEZER. :)

I will tell you a little tale about me and some goats. I have a million goat stories because I use to live with a fellow that owned so many goats that he had one of those fly tapes in each of his windows that had at minimum of 250 flies stuck on each one. The bad thing is he never would change them so on boring days we would count the damn things. When we began counting flies on the tape I called it cabin fever and began listening to Jimmy Buffett and I loved that song "Boat Drinks" just because of the line "This morning, I shot six holes in my freezer, I think I've got cabin fever, somebody sound the alarm" My buddy had a 3000 dollar system with 3000 bucks worth of speakers and we lived out in the woods on 40 acres of land so I would crank the tunes up 3/4 of the way up and it almost made our ears bleed but it sure ended our cabin fever.

One week my buddy was going out of town and needed someone to watch his goats so I told him I would keep an eye on them. Now the goats I was going to watch didn't belong to my buddy they belonged to a friend of his that lived with my buddy before I moved in so this was before the cabin fever times. I had been paralyzed for about 5 years and thought I could do anything a normal person could do and this would be my favor to this guy that would teach me that life isn't as easy as it looks.

This guy had around 20 - 30 goats penned up in a 30 X 40 foot area and he had this trailer parked in the door of the pen that was open on both the front and back. Now the back had double doors that opened outwards and it was a real mess around all those goats. All I had to do was water and feed the goats 3 days in a row just once per day. I felt that I wouldn't have a bit of problem. The ground was so wet and nasty from all the goats stomping and pissing all over the place that they were pretty much standing in mud and on my first visit here I come with my grubby cloths on and my gloves so my hands would stay some what clean and I wheeled my wheelchair up to the pen and looked over the situation. The situation to me seemed easy I wouldn't even have to go into the pen mostly because I couldn't that damn trailer was parked in the opening so all I had to do was open the door and put the grain there and close the doors. I would then throw the hay over the fence and fill the water tubs up with a hose threw the fence. Really nothing to it.

I collected a couple buckets full of oats and whatever the other stuff is that goes in goat food into 3 buckets and I made three trips to the front porch of the house to get hay for the girls. After the hay was gathered and laid on ground I pulled the hose around. I filled the water tubs up to the rim and then threw hay all over the place so everyone could get some and then feeling really good about myself I opened the trailer door. When I got the doors cracked all I saw was feet and ass while the 30 goats charged over me and my head knocking me out and down for the count. I was covered with mud and goats were everywhere. My favor to this guy was a wash and if I could have quit I would have at that moment in time but I was the only one on the 40 acre plot of land. Thank God the acre around the house was fenced or those goats would still be out but I was so messy and pissed off that I grabbed the oats and goodies that the goats hadn't gotten to and I crawled into that trailer and took the food all the way to the back or front of the trailer, depending on your view point, but closest to the pen side of the trailer and I just waited till the goats got tired of acting like fools or was that me I am not sure but they all ended up back in the pen where I shut those doors never to open them again.

From that day till my buddies came home I just threw the oats and stuff over the fence and if they didn't get any I really didn't care. As I have stated before, "I HATES GOATS". From the diary of La Roo

Peace Out

La Roo

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