La Roo

All you need is Love My mind does this little thing like take comments and dissect them until I can personally deal with them like I was out on a coffee shop deck a week ago drinking coffee and talking with a group of people that congregate at this great coffee shop in Tallahassee, Florida called the Black Dog Cafe'. I had just arrived and the time was 7:30 a.m. and one of my friends said hi La Roo and in response I said howdy to my friend and went to the smoking section of the deck to lay my book bag down and get some money out to buy my coffee. After getting and fixing my coffee and saying hi to the Barista indoors I went out onto the deck where just 2 of the group had gathered and I had just seen Pat Benatar the night before and I wanted to tell my friends about the show. I said a couple things and noticed a new face on the deck in the corner of the smoking area eating something. Now there is a sort of family of friends I have been a part of for a while now that I look forward to seeing every day just as if they were my family and we have a great time together and there are 8 -15 individuals that show up every morning like clock work and I believe we all feel the same way about one another but all of the sudden when I was about half way back to my book bag this gentleman stood up, stared straight at me and said, "And I have to listen to all your stories now" and walked off. Now I know I was the one doing all the talking and my 2 friends were busting my balls as they always do with stuff like, "who cares about Pat Benatar" and "who wants to see a picture of that old lady" and such things but this gentleman had not spoken till I got half way to him and he stared right in my eyes when he said these words. I was hurt in the heart for I love people and I really didn't know he was there nor did I think he was listening to me as his back was to the entire deck. Now as wimpy as it sounds I really don't want to be the one to spoil anyone's quiet time and If I had of only known him or how he liked his surroundings to be I might have tried to refrain from talking and laughing and enjoying life by loving my friends as I do I would have treated him with what ever his needs were but since I didn't know the gent I just let him walk off with a I'm sorry look on my face but I think he is gone forever. He looked me right in the eye and said this. Now the Black Dog Cafe' is a kind of home and it is a kind of therapy for me as I need a place to talk to people as I live alone and I have no one that really visits me for any time and the people that do visit me seem to just want to say 20 words and then leave. I don't know why nor do I care I just can't live my life alone without being able to speak to another human being for longer than 10 minutes. There are some weeks I go through that I didn't see people or even have to open my mouth to speak to a person as no one called or came by. I found the Black Dog Cafe' and I am an early kind of person that craves friends and if not friends people that will talk to me. When I got to thinking about the entire situation I couldn't believe that this person would go to a public place to be quiet if so the library is where he should drink his coffee. I felt so bad about ruining this person's morning that I let it ruin 2 weeks of my life. Sensitivity is something that I need to work on as when I care about people I really care and I need people to care about and so they have someone to care about also. There are a drowning bunch of us in this world that want to belong and want to be listened to along with wanting to be listened to also. So, my lesson has been learned and that is to not be so much of a talker but that isn't the point of this little story and example. There are people in the world that want nothing better than to steal our pleasure and to make us feel less than we are. There are people out in the world that only want things done if they are the center of it but there is a reason for these people for they are the ones that are so weak minded that they let the world of demons live in their heads spouting out things to rob us of God's gifts of love and happiness. I believe the scripture goes something like, The Thief cometh not but for to kill, steal, and destroy but I come so that you might have life and have it more than abundantly. I let this gentleman steal my feeling of self worth and rob me of my happiness and to rob me of the one thing I crave in this world and that is companionship. without companionship this world means nothing to me and if I can't forgive the man than I am just as bad as him I now understand him and people like him so that I can be aware of them and I can try to lift their burden if possible but I will never let my life be effected by individuals that can't control their tongues and their lashing out. Thanks God for friends and early mornings. Peace La Roo


La Roo